Drifting with Faith

A lone boat drifting away in the azure ocean, an ocean which looks calm on the surface, but which hides a tumultuous storm underneath. This imagery sounds like an artist’s fantasy. The idea seems to be perfect for a heart rending song, a picturesque painting or even a melodiously melancholic poem, but the one place where this idea does not fit is reality.

We humans like to think that our life is synonymous with order, we cannot bear the idea of the uncertainty that the above image vividly paints. Unfortunately, this is the unfaltering reality of our existence. A reality, that we spend our whole lives covering up. We create illusion upon illusion to assure ourselves that we are ‘sailing’ and not ‘drifting’ along the ocean of life. We make ourselves believe that as long as we do not disturb the ocean, it will never unleash the monsters that are hiding underneath its calm surface upon us. We create numerous illusions until we have transported ourselves as far away from reality as possible.

Yet, reality is omnipresent, no matter how many illusions we create; the cool ocean breeze always drifts through the walls of illusion and reminds us that we are drifting. As hard as we try and give a direction to our boat, the truth stands tall and unchanging at the fact that we do not know our destination. That all is not revealed to us and that in the present moment we are only expected to play out our part.

As a human, I have glorified myself at various points. I have made myself believe that I represent a microcosm of the universe. It has always been all about me. It has always been about my dreams, my ambitions. My life has always been about my happiness and my sorrows. It has been about me celebrating my success and about me learning from failures. My life has always been about me, it has never been about life itself. Throughout, I have focused on the illusion that I am leading myself towards a good life. I have made myself believe that I am sailing, that I am in control. All along when planning for the eternal dream of ‘the’ good life, I have conveniently overlooked the fact that life is not a dream and it is not eternal either. The experiences that I describe here are not unique to me. Everyone goes through these tumults in what they perceive to be life.

Life is a journey, an impromptu journey. Life is drifting in the ocean, enjoying the serenity and understanding that the storm in the belly of the ocean can capsize my boat at any instant. An important lesson of life is to assimilate the fact that although the steering wheel of the boat of life lies solely in our hands, the power to steer our boats is shared among the winds, the waves, the monsters in the belly of the ocean and lastly, ourselves.

The idea is easier expressed than implemented. It is easier to explain the idea than to experience it, after all most of us have been immensely pained and scarred by failure which is not a direct consequence of our actions. Our rationalizing minds refuse to call such cruel twist of events a failure. The mind reasons, “It was not our folly.” Then what do we consider such events to be? The rationalizing mind attributes these events to various fancy yet empty words such as injustice, bias, hatred and many more. Soon, we start believing that we are victims of injustice, bias and hatred and many more such feelings. We turn bitter from inside out. We start believing that we are being targeted, that our innocent selves are being exploited. We wallow in self pity and cry for the lost innocence of the world which is hell bent on destroying precious little us we, who are a microcosm of the universe. Thus, with each incident of the so called injustice, bias and hatred, our rationalizing mind creates the huge wall of illusion.

This wall of illusion is strong enough to prevent good sense from prevailing. Yet, it falls like a pack of cards when a powerful gust of reality wields its power and lashes at it. The deafening sound of breaking illusions shatters us and shames us enough to accept defeat and to resign ourselves from travelling along the journey of life, the breaking down of illusions reduces us from being walkers along the path of life to becoming mere pedestrians.

Such is the vicious circle of the creation and destruction of illusions. As much comfort as illusions lend when they stand tall we crumble easily when they are shattered. If you consider the fact that all this happens just because of the human obsession with reasoning and rationalization, don’t you feel like a fool. If only we, as individuals, as a community, as a city, as a nation and as a world accept the fact that all cannot be explained, that impulses are not limited only to eating chocolates, will we not have better lives. Will our experiences not be more enriched? Will our egos not shrink?

If only we, the human race could and would understand that everything is not meant to be understood. If only we could and would embrace and not try to understand faith, diversity and culture will this world not become more serene a place to live in? If only we as individuals could and would understand the fact that a 100% surety does not exist, that there is always that other factor- Destiny, Karma, God…..which also shares control over our life wont our lives be less complicated, will there not be lesser sad days in our life.

If only we had enough faith in the unknown we could learn to enjoy the drifting nature of our life, we could learn to exalt in the immenseness of the azure ocean, we could even learn to deal with the monsters that lay hidden in the belly of the motion.

It is strange how one tendril of faith, of belief has the power to convert us from being mere pedestrians to becoming walkers, for “A Pedestrian is a man in danger of his life, a walker is a man in possession of his soul”.

And yet, for centuries we have been in possession of rationalizing minds which have taught us to cleverly evade that faith and belief. Which leaves me with a worrying question, “……will we ever learn and accept reality or will we sacrifice our life in the whirlpool of making and breaking illusions?”